Do you know that there are 5 kinds of love language?
One of them is gift, either giving one or receiving one.
If your friend’s number one list of love language is giving/accepting gift, they will feel being super loved if they got a gift.
Unfortunately, my love language is not giving/accepting gift. It’s in number 5. So I will feel not so loved by others if I got one.
These several years, I’ve been struggling with this thing. When someone I love is having birthday or any other celebration, I will come to them, knock their shoulder and directly ask them, “Hi friend, what gift do you want for this christmas?”
The more detail their answer is, the happier I am. Unfortunately, most of the people whom I ask will say, “Nope, I won’t tell you. It should come from the bottom of your heart, you are my friend, you have definitely known me. Try to find out!”
Well, hearing this makes me feel not good, one kind of a broken feeling.
It applies vice versa.
Anytime someone wants to give me a gift, I will definitely be happy if that person can ask me in person. I will tell them in detail. By doing so, it is sure I will like the gift.
And you know what? All this time I thought I’m the only person in this world stuggling to this kind of thing. But tonight, I find some people with this kind of war too.
So whoever you are, a non-gift-man, please know that you are not alone!
And to whoever reading this whose friend is a non-gift-man, please help them! Your clue means A LOT.
Here I present, the story of KG, a returned student from Aussie, a glasses wearer as well.
“One of the most challenging things for me to do is to buy glasses. Usually, my mom will help me to buy it. But not that day, when I was alone at Aussie, finishing my bachelor’s degree, a thousand miles away from my lovely family.
Because of my carelessness, I broke it. I couldn’t really see and study at that time. I had to buy new glasses. I looked at my broken glasses’ guarantee book. Aah, the guarantee just expired exactly 4 days ago. I will need to buy new glasses.
As a university student, I didn’t really have enough money. At the same time, I was too shy to ask for money from my parents. But anyway, I just go to a glasses shop. Since I was lack of experience in choosing glasses, I told the seller to give me the exact model with my broken glasses.
Then he asked me, “May I see your guarantee book?”
I showed it to him, “Here it is. It can’t be used anymore. I will need to buy a new one.”
He saw it for a while, nodding a little bit, “Just 4 days ago.”
Then he looked at me. He was silent for a while, “Please wait.”
Some minutes after that, he came out, brought the exact same glasses like my broken brown glasses. Then hand it on to me.
“How much is it?” asked me to him.
“No, no. You don’t need to pay for me. It’s for you. A gift from me to you.”
“But, why?” asked me surprised.
“Merry Christmas!” smiled him to me.
I was contented, got an early Christmas gift from a stranger I just knew. I was wondering whether he knew I didn’t have enough money or what, but anyway I was super grateful.
Since then, anytime a friend or a family member asked me for a recommended place to buy glasses, I would definitely recommend that shop.
Then some years just passed after that. I move to a place a little bit far from that city. There came another day in which I needed to buy new glasses.
It was running when I was looking for the glasses in an area full of glasses shops. I accidentally get into a shop, stepped my fit in just to protect my body from the raindrops.
There were some people inside the shop, looking for glasses. Among all of the customers, my appearance was the most terrible one. How come? They were all wearing a high-class suit luxury jewelry.
I was wearing … Well I don’t reminder but I was wet of the raindrops, smell bad as well. That kind of smell of wet plus rain plus asphalt and many more. I was not so confident, I walked around the desks, looking for suitable glasses but couldn’t really find one.
Noticed my confusedness, an employee automatically walked towards me. Yeah may be based on his experience, my face could tell everything. So he started to pick up some glasses that he thought will suit my face.
Just some minutes after that, he called me to sit. Gave me 5 options of glasses, then asked me how much my budget was.
After I told him, we could get rid of 3 glasses of those 5 glasses. Then he asked me to choose between 2 glasses. I tried and I fell in love with one of them.
But I was amazed and impressed about how he could help me to choose the glasses. So I asked him, “Hey bro, how do you do it? That fast?”
He smiled warmly, “I see your type of face first. I see whether your face shape is oval, round, square, and so on.”
Then he explained to me, “This type of face is good to wear this A kind of glasses, never wear B type.” And so on and so on.
Then he even taught me, “See the handle, there is a number here. This is your size, never buy the other in another size. Either it’s gonna be too big or too small.”
Such a lesson learned told me to my self.
I wonder how on this earth that buying glasses has this kind of theory. Or knowledge. Or whatever it is, I can say this a concept. I got brief training about how to buy glasses, a very important lesson to be implemented.
Ever since, even I get back to Indonesia, I will go back to Aussie to buy the glasses. The experiences I had there impressed me a lot. That is why I never buy glasses in Indonesia, dear Indonesia’s glasses seller!
It’s August. There are so many cows and goats on the road. No wonder. Just need to counting days, Muslim will soon celebrate Eid.
I took a walk to a supermarket near my living place to buy some drinks. There was a cow bounded to a three. On my way back from the supermarket to my dorm, I saw a crowd surround a tree.
“Oh my God! A tree is falling on someone. He must be injured,” that was I think I saw from afar.
Beside that tree, a 35-year-old woman was crying. As I walk closer, I realize that I was wrong. It wasn’t a tree falling on a man, it is a cow. There were dozens of people were killing the cow. They were binding the cow’s body to the tree and the cow was trying to escape but it can do almost nothing.
Those people cut the cow’s neck. Due to cow’s meat is too thick, I think, they need more time to cut it. So it takes a bit slow. I saw them cut half part of the neck. Blood everywhere. Tears even worsen.
The cow is crying.
The cow is crying.
The cow is crying.
It was might be one of the saddest view in my whole life. I had never seen that emotional scene of animal killing before. I don’t dare to see it.
That’s how I decide not to eat beef. That’s also how I started not eating chicken. For months, I don’t dare to eat animals.
But funnily, I still eat fish and lobster and octopus. I still love eating seafood. Abandoning the fact that seafood tastes delicious, maybe it’s also because I had never seen sea animals crying. Yes for sure, they live in the water!
I live that kind of life for months. Until one day someone asked me, “Why you don’t want to eat animals? It’s delicious.”
Then I told him my sad experience of seeing animal crying.
This what he told me, “Wow, it’s unfair then to plants. You pick them from the ground, cut them, cook them. You end their life. You “kill” them. You eat them. You eat vegetables.
What can they do? They can do nothing. They can’t either scream or cry. They can’t express their feelings. Pity them. And you don’t feel bad at all. You aren’t feeling guilty at all.”
“Why do you feel bad to eat animals? But you don’t feel bad to eat vegetables?”
Who doesn’t know online car? Grabbing an online car to bring us anywhere around the city has been a kind of culture. I ordered a green-brand online car that day, the destination is my lovely dormitory.
Once I open the car’s door, sit on the passenger car and see the driver’s hair from the back chair, I am amazed!
He has such a unique hair. I had never seen it before. To put it into your perspective, it looks like sticking a black hair in the size of ping-pong ball to his head. Round and beautiful and cute. Yeah, at least cute enough for making me have big desire to touch it.
Automatically my mouth say, “Wow you had such a funny typical hair. Never seen this in real before. You just need to wear kimono or whatever Japanese cloth, having sword in your hand and bang! You are a Japanese, Sir.”
“Hahahaa…” we both laughed
“Thanks for your compliment,” said the driver. I can see his smile by glancing to the small mirror in the top middle part of the car.
“Yes your welcome, you truly deserve it! You have heard so many compliments of your hair, I guess. This is not your first right? “
“Hmm, unfortunately, this is my first. Thank you, nona.”
“My very pleasure, Sir! Anyway, being an online driver is your full-time or part-time job?”
“This is my full time.”
“Oh I see, you enjoy it right? “
“Sure. I got freedom, I can manage my own time, not bounded by company’s contract. Beinfg able to join any activities I wish to join. So happy for it.”
“Yes you are right! I do agree. I remember a friend of mine, a driver too, but he is a personal driver of my CEO. He told me that he missed freedom. He needed more time with his family. Lucky you to be able to enjoy your driver life.”
“Yes, I’m so grateful of God’s gift to me. That’s why I hope I can let more people to enjoy happiness.”
We talked so conveniently that I didn’t realized I had arrived to the dormitory. It’s time to say goodbye. “Hello Mr. Japanese Driver, thanks for the nice ride and quality-conversation. I look forward to hear your inspiring story! Good luck for everything! Konichiwa! “
The only sailor I know living in this world is Popeye. No more than him. It becomes different after I met this guy.
One day I took a glass of tea with a stranger in a community’s meet up . And the story flowed.
“So what do you do?”, asked me.
“Driver. I’m a driver.”
“Is it Grab? Go-Jek? Uber?”, I mentioned some big names of start-up companies which provide online transportation booking currently happening in Indonesia.
He gave small smile, “Driver of a ship. I’m a sailor.”
“Aha!” I told myself, “It’s even real!”
“Okay, so how do you do?” I continued asking.
“Seeing sea everyday, day and night. No woman, no kids, either family. Only dozens of men sharing same woods, same roofs, same rooms, same food. Living for months above wide deep blue sea, under shining hot sun every morning and dark blue night every night. It’s cold, very cold. It’s hot, very hot.”
Then he took a deep breath and continued, “Sometimes after I get off from the ship, after months of carrying litters of fuel from Arab to China, I can feel my feet swaying. Although I have super sure I have stepped on the ground, I can still feel like I’m tossed around, shaking here and there. It’s kind of funny.”
One thing that is certain is, “Hugs and smiles from people whom I love, is the first thing I miss once I get to see trees and buildings! It’s been my everyday thoughts too, to keep me motivated, day and night.”